Here, at the end of all things...

Conundrums

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 01:46:48 GMT

Have you ever had one of those moments where your head and your heart tell you different things? I like to think my heart and happiness are more important, but when your adult logic is beating you over the head it's hard to ignore. Can I be an adult for a while and then go off to enjoy my emotional whims? I'll have earned it, right?

Writer's Block: Let the shopping begin!

Fri, 27 Nov 2009 15:05:40 GMT

When do you typically start shopping for holiday gifts? Do you usually wind up buying stuff at the last minute?

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My Christmas shopping is a very simple routine. Starting in November, I start to pick up little things that I know would make good presents for family. Sometimes I find something awesome last minute so I can add the little things to it to make a super-gift. December is when I start looking for friend presents because that's when they're around and I can pick up little hints about what they like (or get them to pick stuff out). Last week before Christmas is when I pick out presents for those people who I didn't buy stuff for but showed up with stuff for me. Those "hey, I'm going to drop by on the weekend to give you your present." people who warn you with enough time so I don't feel like an ass when they just show up and I have nothing.

That's about it. I even have budgets made up for each person but I tend to be flexible and if one person didn't use all their budget it gets moved on to another person. :P

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 23:47:17 GMT

You ever have those days when you want to punch someone in the face? And then after a couple hours you've calmed down to such a degree that you just couldn't give a shit? I mean, DAMN! I totally ignored my half of the store for an hour and ate brownies instead. We didn't have a single customer but I still ignored it. I is such a rebel :B

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 02:13:05 GMT

I had forgotten the date when the radio flicked off at 11am and Flanders Fields started. Automatically I recited it with the guy on the radio as I chopped up some veggies and put everything down when the silence started. In school it was always one of those things you did and then went back to math or whatever but staring down at my half-cut carrots I started to well up a bit. Maybe because of the recently lost veterans we should remember today, or maybe because of the fear of losing more. But I was standing and listening to my boss chop away and talk and when she yelled "hey, what's wrong with the radio?" I let a couple tears fall.

And then that song came on and that too I remembered from school and hummed along. And then they played "hero" by Enrique Iglesias and my mind was full of images of wartime dance halls and tearful last kisses and I started getting misty eyed again.

I've never really been affected by Remembrance Day, but I suppose it's a bit closer to home now.
<3<3<3

shopping-phobia

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 02:57:01 GMT

20% off at the mall today and I still couldn't find as single thing to buy. I went in any store that caught my eye but walked out after seeing scene/hipster fashions and shirts that screamed "high school!!". Didn't bother going into the fancier stores because I don't wear nice business clothes or blouses or anything of that sort...

I think I'm going to move someplace warm and spend the rest of my life in tank tops. Easy and practical.

Writer's Block: Instant attraction

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 14:58:34 GMT

Do you think romantic chemistry is instant or evolving? Have you ever given someone a second (or third) chance and lived to regret it? Have you ever fallen in love with someone you didn't particularly like or desire at first?

View 1137 Answers

Sure it's instant. There are some things that take time to develop though. You might have interests in common, friends or something that draws you together and makes you compatible, but it might take years before you realize their financial maturity, career goals, and neat-freak-ness make you melt with girly adoration... <3 <3 <3

and yes I've given second chances, and have fallen for the "why you" person before.

one of THOSE nights.

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 05:58:51 GMT

Had the fastest onset of a "panic attack" ever. Went to bed at 1, was asleep immediately, and almost at 1:30 exactly I was wide awake, sat straight up and was burning-hot/shivering, jittery/exhausted, nauseous, and confused. Deeeeelightful.

Went for a walk, had a short back rub, and am now in the 30 min to 1 hour "cool-down" period where I'm fine so long as I'm not lying down. Then I can prop up my pillows and doze off into a nice and exhausted sleep.

I hate my life sometimes....

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 15:18:40 GMT

Re-watched Dracula: 2000. Was prepared for shitty movie (wasn't disappointed) but realized shortly into it. HOLY SHIT IT'S GERARD BUTLER! Cutesy, ickle, young, scrawny Gerard with Josh Groban hair! EEEEEE!

I had a bit of a fan-girly spasm

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 23:48:54 GMT

I brought my car in to get it's brakes "finished" but now they're all spongy and I have to go in again tomorrow to get them fixed agaaaaain. Why can't people leave things that aren't broken alone?

And I hate when things like this happen because now I'm really upset and snappy and depressed. I hate when things don't go my way and I end up having to rearrange my schedule.

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 13:07:50 GMT

I hate when people seem sick but won't do anything about it. Especially if those people are far away and I can't force them to do anything. night sweats and trouble breathing isn't normal! GO TO THE DOCTOR! YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!

Considering that flu shot since I work full time this year. A lot of possible exposure. I can't afford to be sick! I hope I can just get it at the doctor.

D00D! VB in 3 HOURS!

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 23:42:12 GMT

D00000D!

I like to get paaaaaid.

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 12:47:02 GMT

What a crazy week at work! I have to have at least 40 hours. Not really a lot but I usually only get 30. And now it's a lovely long weekend and I wake up to wind and rain. Nice...

So, I'm totally excited to make corn meal muffins this afternoon. Does that make me weird?

You vacuous, toffee-nosed, malodorous pervert!

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 01:46:09 GMT

I work with the most immature brat in the world. After a couple days of awkward first-day quietness he erupted into a vile-mouthed, lazy, immature, disobedient, smart-ass. He doesn't do what I tell him to, he makes disgusting jokes, he refers to me with repulsive names ("sexy lips"? what the fuck?) and puts himself in the way when you're trying to get something important done. And he answers his phone while serving customers. I swear to GOD I will smack him one of these days.

</rant>

WEEKEND

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 13:31:02 GMT

I spent the weekend at the lake doing yardwork. It was OMFGFUUUUUN! I got dirty and tanned and Steph fussed about sunscreen and dinner and made me lunch and gave me gloves and earplugs because she was worried and we went to the market and bonded and....

I MISS HAVING A MOMMY! WAAAAAAAAH! *tear*

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 13:20:45 GMT

You know what pisses me off? socks on the floor. I can understand taking off a sweater and hanging it on a chair or something but just throwing socks onto the floor? It's like littering! I swear I'm just going to start throwing these things away. I find them under my couch, under the tables, behind desks. AAARGH!

In other news I have design work again. Yaay!

In OTHER, other news I had the best weekend of my life last weekend. It was 99% perfect. I'm still happy from it.

Oh yeah, and the girl I work with wants to try to go back to school NEXT WEEK instead of in January when she originally planned. Let's see how THIS fucks up the workplace!

2012

Wed, 02 Sep 2009 14:40:33 GMT

This made me feel strangely comforted about something I didn't fear in the first place. I salute you, sir.

bursting into tired tears at 2am = no fun

Mon, 31 Aug 2009 22:00:23 GMT

Why is it that when I get rid of one annoyance I just get another one? I get rid of the noisy teenager, I get construction. That ends and I get jumpy kids. Then, suddenly, there's a constant fan or something making my room sound like a furnace. Why? Did I do something wrong in the past and now I'm not allowed to sleep at night?

dreams to dream

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 02:11:25 GMT

I know I shouldn't, REALLY shouldn't, but there was an add at the gym and I had to look online and then I kept looking and...

oh god, it's beautiful

Tue, 18 Aug 2009 00:23:07 GMT

I'm going to be heading to the recruitment office wednesday to see what kind of military trades I could do. Maybe there's something without too much school, or something they can help me go to school to do. I still feel bad about turning my back on my degree, but if it can get me a career, I'll brave college again.

The course id like to take (carpentry) doesn't start until next summer so I'd have a lot of time to make money before school, but if there's a way to get the military to pay for it then I'd be all for that. and I can use my 3D knowledge and photoshop skill for carpentry. I can make models to show people products. At least I can feel like I'm making some use of my education. :P

being lazy is fun!

Sat, 15 Aug 2009 21:32:08 GMT

I had such an amazing week off! Spent a lot of time outside doing yardwork with Tyler, shopped, ate out, and drove around in the coolest truck listening to amazing music. I really wish I wasn't going to back work monday, or at least not back to my current work.

Passing out resumes didn't go so well, but there's still a chance someone might call me. None of them were very positive, though. I'm not sure how long I should wait before changing the career plans, or even if I should. Carpentry sounds pretty interesting but I don't know if I'd get work doing that either. The military is instant full-time work but I'd feel bad getting all this education and then just going military. However, the money is amazing. I hate to seem shallow but money is everything right now. I want to feel "established" in life: career/house/car.

but aside from all that, the week was great. Can't wait for the long Labourday Weekend to do some more yardwork and maybe go to Moxie's again. ;)

Writer's Block: Fantasy Sports

Tue, 04 Aug 2009 13:30:18 GMT

Imagine you manage a coven of baseball-playing vampires. The Cullen family is really strong this year and you want to bring in a ringer. Which currently active MLB baseball player do you sire?

Submitted By seannau

View 502 Answers

What? What is this shit?! Who came up with this question. Wouldn't it have been easier to say "Hey! If you had your own baseball team, who would you have on it?"? Why the whole Twilight reference bullshit? WHY?!

I'm all for shameless plugs but this is just ridiculous.

time for FUUUUN

Sat, 01 Aug 2009 21:58:46 GMT

I have two days off. To wonderful, glorious days off! now I just have to get a hold of my friends and make them do something fun and exciting. I think they're at a movie though so I may have to wait. OOOOOH the wait is killing me. :p

time to invest in some ginger ale

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 06:51:13 GMT

I'm sick of these (what I assume are) panic attacks. I wake up at some random time of the night and am hot and nauseas and edgy and can't sleep. Usually I'm fine if I get up and do something but some nights nothing will calm me down and I wander the house in a furry, swearing and crying and trying not to throw up and fall asleep at the same time.

I'm on my SECOND one tonight. First one was pretty normal, went back to sleep around 2. But then I woke up at 3, felt like I was going to die, wandered the house, drank water, stripped, froze so I re-dressed, stripped again. I felt so gross and fed-up I jumped in a freezing cold shower. Once I could breathe again (it was a shock) I felt a bit better. almost and hour later and I'm not doing too badly. I've unfurled from fetal position at least.

I'm just not sure what to do about my wet hair... :P

[edit] ended up going to "sleep" at 6:30am, then around 7am I popped a bunch of gravol and slept until 2pm. wooohoo!

schedules of DOOM

Sun, 05 Jul 2009 12:18:55 GMT

My first Sunday... this should be loads of fun. only 2 more after this one *sob*. But to all you people who are used to seeing me? You might not for a while. I work the next two weekends, and then Tyler is home after that and then I don't know and then I'm visiting mom.... BUT I shall try to get a hold you everyone on a regular basis so do not fear! pray for my sanity instead. please!

more more mooooore

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 22:53:54 GMT

Another one of these? well, Jason does pickt e good ones

Dare you to detail why you kissed the last person you kissed?
Because I love them?

Tell me the truth, why did you fall in love with your ex?
No clue. Must have been the sweet geekiness and the fact I was 12

Are you afraid of losing the last person you talked to?
I love you mommy! *cling*

Is anything bothering you?
work. life. loooooads of stuff

What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?
uuuuugh work at 11?

Is anyone else in the room with you?
nah

Who was the last person you had a conversation with on the phone?
my mommy

How do you feel right now?
hungry

Does anyone call you babe?
jokingly

Would you ever get a tattoo?
totally already beat you to it

What are you most anxious/excited for?
summer vacation. OH GOD summer vacation.

What is your favorite drink?
fancy cocktails

What was the first thing you thought of this morning?
uggggghhhhhhrrgghhhh

Are you satisfied with what you currently have in life?
it works well enough

What were you doing at 7:00 am?
unconscious!

Do you know anyone who has been arrested?
a few

If you could go back in time, how far back would you go?
good question

Have you ever kissed the last person you texted?
no? haven't texted in so looong I don't know

Think back to the last person you kissed, how many times have you cried in front of them?
oh god. don't get me started

Whats something you do when you're mad?
nothin. silence. boiling anger within

When is the last time you said "i love you" to your number 1?
Many months ago.

How do you feel about your hair right now?
wish it were longer and straighter. it's getting there

Have you ever had someone sing to you?
yes, but only while playing silly party games

Who was last person you texted last night?
no one!

What’s on your mind?
fooooooooood

Have you done something bad today?
not really

Are you jealous of someone right now?
sure

What makes you happy most of the time?
family, friends

Do you have any siblings?
yup

What are/were you doing at 12 this afternoon?
working

Do you get distracted easily?
very

What did you do last night?
played Halo with mah bois!

If you were paid 1 million dollars, would you kiss someone that was the same sex as you?
I've definitely done it for less.

What time is it?
7:42pm

So, what did you do today? Anything interesting?
listened to my bosses scream at each other in Arabic

Have you ever skipped school?
only with permission :B

If you did or if you do now, what do you usually do?
went home early

Are you sick right now?
only in the head

Is anything hurting on your body?
arms

Do you have a tattoo?
yup

Do you think lip piercings are dumb?
depends. usually they are

Do you drink coffee?
from time to time

Have you ever been to starbucks?
um. who hasn't?

What do you usually order?
something chai or iced

What's the nearest thing that's green?
thumbtack

Were you ever good in English class?
I would say so, yes. (98% in advanced bitches!)

What about history?
not so much

Are you on the high honor roll, or have you been?
highest academic average in high school AND college, thank you

What do you like to do in your spare time?
play video games and watch movies

Do you work?
full time

Where?
deli

Can you drive yet?
yup. I just need a vehicle.

Would you take a road trip with your friends?
in a heartbeat.

Have you ever been to six flags?
sadly no. I want to go sooo badly

Do you think Johnny Depp is hot?
sure, if you can't see his chickenlegs.

What about Brad Pitt?
meeeh

What room are you in?
my bedroom

How much money do you have on you?
none on me right now

What's the color of your cell phone?
don't got one

Do you know any creepy old guys?
tooons of them from work

Who was the last person that hit on you?
I don't quite remember

What did he or she say?
don't remember?

What kind of smiley do you use most?
:)

Think of your last two kisses, were they with the same person?
yes

What is something you disliked about your day?
nothing yet!

Who did you talk to on the phone last/why?
mommy because I felt like calling?

Do you have someone who you can be your complete self around?
a couple

Do you think relationships are hard?
as hard as you make them

This time last year, do you remember who you liked?
obviously.

What were you doing at 1 this morning?
sleeping

Has anyone ever seen you kiss the last person you kissed?
oh god yes. it was awkward

Is life good?
so far so good

Told your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else?
when i was younger

Ever told someone you loved them but didn't mean it?
no

Do you open up to a lot of people?
no

Are you nice to everyone?
i try

Do you brush your hair with a comb or a brush?
both

Have you ever given up on anyone?
sure

What were you doing Saturday?
hanging with my sis, and went to a birthday party

Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months?
obviously

Where were you at 2:00 this morning?
are you some sort of stalker?

What is something you currently want right now?
food

Have you ever been punched by the opposite sex?
yes. not hard but it's happened.

Who knows you the best?
shawn and Tyler (or my family, I guess)

Do you miss anyone?
yeah -------^

Is crying a sign of weakness?
no

Do you really want to please everybody?
yes

Could you last an hour without talking?
no

What are you listening to right now?
nothing

Why are you doing this survey?
too much time to kill

How many windows are open on your computer?
usually 4+ at any given moment. right now it's 3 as I'm about to turn it off.

What are you doing after this?
DINNER!

How tall are you?
5'3"

Last hug from the opposite sex?
mahmoud yesterday. ewwwwww

When's the last time you got stung by a bee?
i don't think I have

What's a word that rhymes with DOOR?
s'more

Did you take a nap today?
no

If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
yes

Do you straighten your hair?
all the time

What time did you wake up today?
9-ish

Last thing you drank?
sip of narsty beer

Think a lot before you fall asleep?
nope

What will you be doing this weekend?
too far to tell!

Will tomorrow be better than today?
everyday is exactly the same

How much longer until your birthday?
months

Who bought you the clothes your wearing?
bought the top, stole the pants. :P